How Do I Know if I Need Therapy?

This is probably one of the most common questions to come up when we first start thinking about seeing a counselor. It also has a lot of misconceptions attached that can sometimes deter us before we even get started. I wanted to take a moment to talk about and debunk some of these misconceptions, so that when we do make a decision, we’re more well-informed about the therapy process.

Therapy is for people who are severely mentally ill.

Although counseling is certainly vital to those who are suffering with a significant mental illness, counseling is not solely reserved for those individuals. People in this world have a variety of needs, and counseling is utilized to meet those varying needs. There are different approaches and treatment focuses depending on the issue that is being addressed, therefore counseling does not look the same for each individual. Odds are, whatever you may be struggling with, there are therapists out there who will be able to address and help you through it.

You only seek therapy if you’re dealing with intense, overwhelming issues, not for “small problems.”

In my perspective, there is no “big” or “small” problem in life. Problems are problems, and the “size” of them is really based on the eye of the beholder. Further, everyone has a right to their experiences, and comparing them to others invalidates our own feelings and struggles. Everyone also deserves to seek help, whatever they may be struggling with—after all, we all deserve to build a satisfying, fulfilling life for ourselves.

So my response to this is that regardless of a problem’s “size,” if it’s impacting you, then it deserves attention. If you’re not sure how to navigate whatever you may be struggling with, you deserve to seek clarity and get help on how to build a better life for yourself. A therapist will often be more than happy to help you along that process.

Lying on a couch, talking about my feelings, and being “psychoanalyzed” doesn’t sound appealing to me.

When some people think of therapy, they often conjure up archaic images of a Sigmund Freud type character silently writing notes in an armchair, while you lie on the couch and talk for an hour.  Although there may be a select few who may operate in this way, most therapists these days don’t take this approach.

As I mentioned, there are a variety different therapy approaches and styles, and many therapists typically take on several approaches depending on the needs and goals of the client. Some therapists may be more direct in their style, others may be less directive, etc. Every person has their own specific needs from therapy or a therapist, so it’s a matter of finding a therapist whose style is in alignment with your needs.

And if you’re not sure, it’s completely okay to “try on” different therapists to explore what may work or doesn’t work for you. So if you’re adverse to a certain style of therapy, you can always explore and find one that is more of a fit.

So how do I know if I need to go to therapy?

If you’re already in a place where you’re asking the question, then most likely therapy is worth trying. Simply put, if there is an aspect in your life or within yourself that is negatively impacting you, then therapy could benefit you. Sometimes having an outside perspective can help, and a therapist is trained to help you further understand yourself and learn relevant skills that may benefit you in your struggles.

If you’re still not sure, you can always reach out to a therapist for a consultation, or perhaps focus your initial sessions on gaining more inner clarity re: your needs or immediate next steps.

Also, it’s okay if you don’t feel ready right now. Everyone has their own timing in their journey, and therapy will always be here when you do feel ready.